what's important?

I am so blessed to have come from the United States, from an educated and prosperous family. Living here in Honduras, I have been struck over and over again by what is necessity vs what is comfort - as there are SO many differences between the US and here. I see that no matter where we are in life - we will always want more. The other day, I was sitting on my bed talking to Erin and I said, "I wish we had a DVD player." And then it struck me... children right outside my door didn't eat ANYTHING that day, they don't have a house, they don't have a bed, they don't have a couch, they don't have a TV, they don't have movies.. WOW. There is SOO much that we take for granted. so much.
Sometimes I have to remind myself that I am living in a third-world country - and that the majority of people have very little here. The average income for a family in Honduras is $850.00 a year, with over fifty-four percent of the people living below Honduras' own poverty line. Twenty two percent of the population does not have adequate sources of clean water and twenty-nine percent do not have access to health care. The teachers who are very well off make $9,000 a year. While things are much less expensive here, the whole standard of living is SO different. I write these facts as a reminder to myself of WHERE I am living.. where the Lord has called me to be.
When I am not working at Brassavola, I spend my time in relationships and "earning the right to be heard" with the Hondurans here. As I have been building trust, the Hondurans have been more and more honest with me about how they view North American missionaries. I am not sure that I want to write what all that I have learned or heard.. however, I must say that living somewhere with the title "Missionary" brings so many preconceived ideas with it. People think of someone who will give handouts - who will help out poor people materially. The Hondurans will take whatever we will give them... but when it comes to matters of the heart and the soul - they don't trust the missionaries. The natives here watch the "extranjeros" - or foreigners - in everything that we do - and they see the missionaries living in the best parts of town with the rich people, going out to eat frequently at American restaurant, and then saying that we are "poor" (which is true for US standards, BUT not at all for the people here).
I have struggled with the question "what is a missionary" since I've been here. Time and time again I've come back to the idea that a missionary shares LIFE with people - living among them, getting to know their needs, their hearts, their souls. How can we expect to impact people if we are not willing to live as they do? How can we expect them to let us into their lives unless we live life side-by-side with them? God doesn't tell us that in following Him that we are guaranteed all of the comforts we experience in the United States. Why aren't we living in the little town we want to impact? Am I impacting the people I am living around? Jesus said, "if anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his live for me will save it. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?" (Luke 9:23-25).
In considering my life here - and considering all the stuff that I have in the United States, just sitting there... for what? Jesus said, "do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." (Matthew 6:33)
My "stuff" in the US is almost like a safety net for me (that I will have STUFF and money to go back to when I return) - but Jesus reassures me not to worry about my life or what I will eat or drink - about my body or what I will wear.. but to SEEK FIRST the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things (that I worry about like my future job, husband, place to live) will be given unto me as well (Matthew 6:25-33).
God wants us to TRUST Him completely - without a safety net - and it is only when we are holding on to God instead of our family, our house, our cars, our money, or our comfort that we really allow God to have the FREEDOM to use us. God doesn't guarantee us a comfortable life - nor does He necessarily ask us to give up all we have - Paul wrote that He learned to be content in plenty or in want - SO where is our heart, is it in Christ or in comfort? How much are we holding on to all that we have? If Jesus asked you to take all that you have and give it to the poor, and then go and follow Him - would you do it?
The last thing I want to do is make anyone feel bad about what they have or what they want - but this is what the Lord has been laying on my heart this week to share. I am being challenged to consider truly where my treasure is... and also to consider how to be a good steward of ALL that the Lord has blessed my life with. I am faced daily with people whose only possession is the smelly shorts and shirt they are wearing, children who go to school to learn but do not have teachers who know how to teach... and so much more. I am so grateful for all that I have, all the opportunities that I have been given and that I can choose from... so what to choose...

todo eres Tu, Jesus.

"Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life" (1 Tim 6:17-19)